Women’s Role in Society

KARACHI: Women’s Day was celebrated a little early at TDF Ghar on Saturday as some very courageous and determined women stepped forward to share their stories of how they are playing their role in society to ensure the future for girls here is fair, safe and bright.

There was a mother working on removing stigmas and educating people on how to behave around special persons, a youth with cerebral palsy is leading a normal life with a successful career, another young woman in a wheelchair has not let muscular dystrophy come in her way of completing her education and finding a caring and supporting life partner, yet another young woman carries on her work of breaking stereotypes as she follows her heart and achieves her dreams and a group of girls join hands as girls guides to help and inspire others.

Thanks to her talks at various forums and awareness work on social media, Rabia Aziz is now better known as ‘Aaliya’s mother’. Having already given birth to a boy Rabia longed to have a daughter some day but when five years ago that day finally came they were told that their baby girl was not ‘normal’. She was born with a genetic disorder known as Apert’s Syndrome with and oddly shaped skull, no fingers and fused toes. Still thanks to Rabia’s determination Aaliya at five today is doing what doctors had never given them hope for. She has undergone 13 surgeries so far and there may be more to come. But Rabia said that she will do all that she can for her little girl.

Still, the mother feels terrible when people stare at Aaliya, who can walk now and is quite a happy and confident child. “But I will not hide my daughter from the world because it is not her fault that she has Apert’s Syndrome,” said Rabia. “We at home have our own standard of ‘normal’ for Aaliya. She is ‘normal’ for us the way she is,” she added.

“So I have started my own drive called Special Needs Pakistan where I teach others especially children how to interact with differently-abled children persons. Instead of staring we teach them to smile if they have nothing else to say to anyone they may come across who might be different. We also help other parents of special children by guiding them on how to care for and build confidence in their children,” she said.

Farhat Rasheed, who was diagnosed with cerebral palsy when she was nine months old, said that her family had an aim to help her lead a normal life. “Everyone in this world is faced with one issue or the other whether it is physical, emotional or financial. Mine was physical and I was taught how to live with it by first identifying it and then accepting it before moving ahead positively,” she said. Getting an education took her to places which were not her first choices but they at the time were the only ones who were supportive of her needs and had ramps and lifts to allow her easy access to her classes, etc.

Today, Farhat is an advocate for others in wheelchairs. Though Show You Care or SYC she and her team explain to others why ramps are important at public places. “When they say that people like us don’t go to restaurants and the movies anyway and that ramps would be a waste of space, we tell them to think about why people in wheelchairs can’t go out like others,” she said. “Not just for us, ramps will also be a great help for babies in strollers,” she added.

Next, Madiha Siddiqi who has muscular dystrophy, shared how her parents never let her give up and how her positive outlook on life brings so many gifts her way.

Meanwhile, Rameesha Shahid, Pakistan’s first female kick-boxing trainer, said that she has been trying to do away with stereotypes all her life. “As a child I was known as a tomboy. I wanted to play all the time and there was no game or sport which I had not championed,” she said. “I hail from a family of academicians and doctors. Everyone in my family is highly accomplished but they wondered what I’d do with my life,” she shared. But today, Rameesha, too, has made her family very proud of her by just following her dreams and doing and excelling at things women in our society don’t normally take up.

Finally, several young women of the Pakistan Girls Guide Association spoke about their work in spreading awareness about various things and helping others help themselves.

Published in Dawn, March 5th, 2018